You Can’t Make This Stuff Up! (Crazy Job Requests Part 2)

By | August 20, 2013

Thanks to everyone who posted their own stories alongside those I shared last week from the LinkedIn Print Production Professionals discussion group. Here are a few more hilarious stories. Keep yours coming, too!

While working with a client on an artwork for a well known drinks brand, I had the challenge of trying to make their brand orange colour out of CMYK. As it was an advert insert there was no option of using a spot colour. Obviously it was a bit muddy and not very vibrant but I was happy that it was the best of a bad situation. Client wasn’t and wanted to change it.

Client: “Can we add more yellow?”

Me: “The colour has 100% yellow in it.”

Client: “But its not orange enough, can we make it more orange?”

Me: “We can only use yellow and magenta to make the orange.”

Client: “Okay, can we add more magenta?”

Me: “We could, but the colour will be too red.”

Client: “Okay, then can we add more yellow as well to balance it?”

Me: “Te colour already has 100% yellow, we can’t add any more.”

Client: “Why not, we need to add more yellow!”

Me: “But we already have 100% yellow.”

Client: “Okay, but can we make it more orange?”

That was an interesting evening.

— Jim Wiseman (Create@EC1 LLP, London)

Have you heard the one about the job I printed on the plastic stock NYCMetro cards are printed on? Stock sat at the printers waiting for endless client changes just building up static electricity. Pressman had to wear copper wire bracelets and press was wired in copper wires. One pressman got tossed across the pressroom when he went to load stock into the press.

— Ina West (insideout Advertising, New York City)

“I don’t want grey. I’m looking for more of a light black.”

— Dave Flach (Bassett Printing Corporation, Atlanta)

Back in the day, I received a disk from an art department via our sales person. The creative department let me know that the fonts where not included. I instructed the sales person to call the client and ask them to forward on the fonts. After talking to the client, he came to me and said the fonts where in the document, probably near the end of the last page… and yes he was serious.

— John Brogan Jr. (Great Expectations Marketing, New York City)

What are your stories? Please keep the party going . . . share below!

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4 thoughts on “You Can’t Make This Stuff Up! (Crazy Job Requests Part 2)

  1. Mike Porter

    One customer insisted on supplying their own paper stock to run letters on our Xerox cut sheet printers. It finally showed up the day we were scheduled to do the job. After running a few hundred pages we noticed faint images of logo from the top of the page showing up in the letter body. This replication problem happens when ink from the pre-printed stock gets transferred to the paper rollers.

    The client revealed that they had printed the stock only that morning. “Just let it dry a while”, he said. So we uncrated the stuff and stacked it all around the computer room. We tried several more times over the next few days, with no improvement. We suspected the densely-printed logo was done in latex-based ink which was melting during the high-heat fusing process in the printers.

    “I’ll get you some new stock”, said the customer finally. “Change to heat-resistant ink” we insisted.

    The customer delivered new paper stock the next day. By now the job was a week late. It ran fine for a while, until the entire facility was filled with a burnt acrid smell. The operators found the printer’s heat roller covered with black, sticky, dripping gunk. Nobody knew what it was.

    The answer was revealed when the customer called to ask if the LACQUER he applied over the logo had worked!

    We pulled the job and charged the customer for the heat roller and service call. We never heard from him again.

  2. Louise Kralka

    Some of my favorites

    Me: Do you want your card to be printed printed head to head, or head to toe?
    Client: Can you print it back to back?

    Client requested the electronic file for her die line.
    Client phoned back quite upset as we sent a die line without bleed and she was told she must have bleed!

    Client wanted to do a reprint of 3 panel folder but wanted to eliminate center panel. The client questioned: But why do you have to redo the prepress work, can’t you just cut the plates?

  3. Suzanne M.

    We produced a perfect-bound catalog for a customer. When final samples delivered, the customer was unhappy with the crop on one page, and asked that we reprint “just that one page” and replace it, in the already-bound 750,000 books.

  4. Sylvius H.

    The representative of a new customer, wanted to make an express visit to our plant as well as have an in-depth discussion with the technical and production manager just to make sure we own CMYK presses and not… RGB! The only way we thought we might was showing her the ink cans on the sheet fed machines as well as the drums in the pumping station for the web machines. Luckily they were all clearly labeled CYAN, MAGENTA, YELLOW, BLACK. There was a bit of a problem convincing the representative that K standed for Black…

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